Tuesday, April 26, 2011

A View from the Other Side

This week's RemembeRED prompt was to write about a time something seemingly terrible happened, but looking back, it brought something wonderful.


I hung on, claws in. The darkness surrounding me was hidden somehow. It must have been the small pieces of light within it. The children. My faith. My hope. My belief.

Seventeen years, married to an alcholic and addict. I was determined to make it work. Forgiveness, time after time.

Then finally, a year of sobriety. I learned what life was like, after seventeen years, I knew what a drug and alcohol free life was like. I saw victory, my hope that I held out for.

A year...only a year. Just a glimpse.

 Then it returned again. This time the darkness was visible. The heaviness on my heart was unbearable. The little pieces of light were no longer enough.
The fight was gone, the claws retreated. Defense down.

The pain of release of the hope and belief. The fear stifling.

But it is only from the view I have now where I can see it all clearly. Those years molded me, strengthened me, and made me who I am. Standing here in the light, I can see those dark times for what they were. Here I am happy and whole. Strong and focused. Wise and compassionate. Healed.and happy.

6 comments:

  1. In such a little amount of space, I believe you fully captured what it is to live w/ an addict. Well done.

    ReplyDelete
  2. "Healed and happy."
    LOVE that, you are a survivor. Life with addiction of any kind is so very hard!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Wow! Your word choice is almost poetic as you describe this horrible experience.

    ReplyDelete
  4. This is a great, concise piece. The battle with drugs and alcohol is brutal, poisonous and life changing. I am so sorry you had to experience it in your life. :-( Visiting from TRDC.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Your words hit home, you're enlightening me to my Hubby's world. Thank you for that.

    ReplyDelete
  6. these words resonate with me. I have never been married to an addict, but i do know what it is like to live with one. and struggle occasionally myself. thanks for capturing this so perfectly.

    ReplyDelete

I would love to have some feedback. Let me know what you love...and let me know what you don't.